Last month, I decided to follow in my mother's footsteps and make 12 changes over the year to help me overcome my depression. Last month, my challenge was to manage my time so that I could keep busy.
This only half worked.
I started off well at the beginning of term. I was getting up early every day, going to bed at a reasonable time so I had lots of energy. I was trying to schedule my time so that I worked more productively. Then I fell behind a bit in my plan to write up my lecture notes in neat each week to keep on top of revision. This made me feel like I didn't deserve to do anything that wasn't work related, but I was in too bad of a mood to be motivated. The boyfriend and I also had some issues with communication that were causing us problems.
Despite the lack of motivation, I feel like I am in a better place in terms of my degree than I was last term. I am (mostly) on top of my assignments, and even have enjoyed doing a couple of them. I like Number Theory. The assignments I've had marked and handed back to me have been quite well graded, so I'm pleased with that. Most of my modules are fine, there is just one that I am really struggling to get my head around.
Another thing that has gotten me down is that I have had to stop running. I have a recurring problem with my knee that means it actually hurts to run, and hurts for a few days after I have done so. I went to the doctor, and I have a referral for a physio , but the earliest appointment I have been able to get is at the end of March... I have, however, been trying to do some exercises anyway to keep the strength up. I actually completed my 30 day challenge, which I am really pleased about - the furthest I've gotten previously before forgetting/giving up was about day 8. I bought a pilates set with a yoga ball and some weights in to hopefully spark some more interest for myself. I didn't manage to keep up with yoga, but I feel like I have been working on strength quite well, so I'm counting my exercise challenge as a job well done.
This month, as well as trying some new ideas with the boyfriend to get our schedules back up and running and effective once more, I want to focus on music. Music is a massive part of my life, but recently I have not felt in the mood for singing or playing. I don't go to Glee anymore, partly because of an awkward timetable, partly because I spend all of my time at archery, but also because I haven't been in the right frame of mind for it. This month, I want to change that.
This challenge was actually the boyfriend's idea. After I let him take my ukulele to Uni with him to try and learn, he came up with the idea of trying to learn a duet together, him on ukulele, me on guitar, that we can practice over skype. This should be interesting because he isn't the greatest singer (although admittedly, he is getting better) and when I play guitar, the sound on my skype goes really quiet so I can't hear him anymore.
As well as the duet, I want to learn some new songs for myself. I have done some googling to find the supposed best song of each decade to find inspiration. I want to learn songs that either I wouldn't normally sing, or I haven't played already. This is my list so far:
1: 1950s, Johnny B Goode
2: 1960s, Save the Last Dance For Me
3: 1970s, Heart of Glass
4: 1980s, not sure yet, but maybe I Want To Know What Love Is
5: 1990s, again not sure. Best I could find was Baby One More Time
6: 2000s, Hey Ya
7: 2010s, The Words
(Excuse me while I get distracted by the yummy-ness that is Colin o'Donoghue)
And for our duet, Up
Let me know if you have any other suggestions for songs :)
Monday, 9 February 2015
Monday, 5 January 2015
January 2015
January is always the time people decide to change. A new year, a new me. It should be simple right? Wrong. Change is one of the hardest things to do, and it is something that I don't deal well with at all. I know there is a lot of change that is going to happen this year - I will be graduating, I will have to find a job, potentially somewhere new to live away from my family and my boyfriend. I don't know what is going to happen with that, and that terrifies me. However, I know that if I don't make some changes to my life now, it is going to be that much harder.
I suffer a lot from depression and it has really started to affect my life. I used to joke a lot with Liberty about us "catching" depression sometimes, where we would have all the feelings of depression, but only for a couple of days and then we'd feel better. In the last year though, I have been feeling more and more like I am only catching happiness sometimes. It has made it very hard to be motivated to work, to be happy with being here at University and has put a huge strain on my relationship with the boyfriend. My depression has been causing him difficulties with being away at Uni too, so we have had a very hard couple of months.
Over the Christmas holidays we talked a lot, and I talked to my family a lot. I discovered that a lot of my feelings are the same as what my mum gets, even down to not being able to hug or say "I love you" because you just feel nothing. Neither of us likes feeling like that, and I don't like how my depression is affecting me or the boyfriend, so I have decided to try and do something about it. I really don't like the idea of going to a doctor, getting medication or counselling. It really doesn't sit right with me, so I have to do something, I have to make the change.
Last year, instead of making New Year's Resolutions, my mum made 12 monthly changes throughout the year. This ranged from something little like using more of her lotions and potions, to the more difficult challenge of "just get on and do it". Liberty is following suit this year with her own monthly challenges, and that is what I am going to do as well. New Year's Resolutions are doomed to fail because so much happens in a year that you will forget what you said you wanted to do and who knows if what you want now is the same as what you will want in 6 months time? However, I fully believe that setting yourself targets and challenges is beneficial and good for you, so why not do it on a smaller scale.
My 12 monthly challenges are going to be tied in to helping me manage my depression. I want to make them realistic and also measurable so I can get to the end of the month and (hopefully) look back and be able to say "yes, I achieved that". This month, I am focusing on trying to keep myself busy and use my time productively, instead of wasting time feeling sorry for myself. I have a schedule that I am going to draw up each night with things I want to achieve the next day, work I want to get done and rewards for when I take a break to motivate myself. Keeping busy is going to help me to not feel so lost when the boyfriend leaves for his University in a couple of days. Hopefully my productivity will increase and allow me to study better to help me get back on track for a 2:1 at the end of my degree. Scheduling my days better will give me time to set aside for getting into some kind of fitness regime, which will also help to improve my health. Alongside my monthly challenge, I am taking part in Jantastic to get me back into running, and doing a 30 day challenge and some form of yoga everyday to strengthen my body and make me feel better about myself. A healthy body is a healthy mind after all.
The best thing about these monthly challenges is that I am not alone when I do them. Liberty has already been giving me tips for keeping busy and what I can set some of my challenges to, my mum always supports me and wants to give me all the help she can, and my boyfriend is right there beside me trying to change his life for the better, so we can be better together. I think between us we can make it through.
I suffer a lot from depression and it has really started to affect my life. I used to joke a lot with Liberty about us "catching" depression sometimes, where we would have all the feelings of depression, but only for a couple of days and then we'd feel better. In the last year though, I have been feeling more and more like I am only catching happiness sometimes. It has made it very hard to be motivated to work, to be happy with being here at University and has put a huge strain on my relationship with the boyfriend. My depression has been causing him difficulties with being away at Uni too, so we have had a very hard couple of months.
Over the Christmas holidays we talked a lot, and I talked to my family a lot. I discovered that a lot of my feelings are the same as what my mum gets, even down to not being able to hug or say "I love you" because you just feel nothing. Neither of us likes feeling like that, and I don't like how my depression is affecting me or the boyfriend, so I have decided to try and do something about it. I really don't like the idea of going to a doctor, getting medication or counselling. It really doesn't sit right with me, so I have to do something, I have to make the change.
Last year, instead of making New Year's Resolutions, my mum made 12 monthly changes throughout the year. This ranged from something little like using more of her lotions and potions, to the more difficult challenge of "just get on and do it". Liberty is following suit this year with her own monthly challenges, and that is what I am going to do as well. New Year's Resolutions are doomed to fail because so much happens in a year that you will forget what you said you wanted to do and who knows if what you want now is the same as what you will want in 6 months time? However, I fully believe that setting yourself targets and challenges is beneficial and good for you, so why not do it on a smaller scale.
My 12 monthly challenges are going to be tied in to helping me manage my depression. I want to make them realistic and also measurable so I can get to the end of the month and (hopefully) look back and be able to say "yes, I achieved that". This month, I am focusing on trying to keep myself busy and use my time productively, instead of wasting time feeling sorry for myself. I have a schedule that I am going to draw up each night with things I want to achieve the next day, work I want to get done and rewards for when I take a break to motivate myself. Keeping busy is going to help me to not feel so lost when the boyfriend leaves for his University in a couple of days. Hopefully my productivity will increase and allow me to study better to help me get back on track for a 2:1 at the end of my degree. Scheduling my days better will give me time to set aside for getting into some kind of fitness regime, which will also help to improve my health. Alongside my monthly challenge, I am taking part in Jantastic to get me back into running, and doing a 30 day challenge and some form of yoga everyday to strengthen my body and make me feel better about myself. A healthy body is a healthy mind after all.
The best thing about these monthly challenges is that I am not alone when I do them. Liberty has already been giving me tips for keeping busy and what I can set some of my challenges to, my mum always supports me and wants to give me all the help she can, and my boyfriend is right there beside me trying to change his life for the better, so we can be better together. I think between us we can make it through.
Tuesday, 23 September 2014
Summer
Yesterday my summer holiday officially ended. I packed my things into my Mum's car, left my hometown and moved into my new Uni accommodation. On the journey, Mum and I were trying to remember what had happened over the summer. It was really hard because the beginning of the holidays felt so far away. It felt like a year since we had made the journey to Coventry, rather than the few months it has been.
This summer, I found out that I was no longer staying on the four year course of my degree, but instead was being moved down to the three year course. I wasn't really too upset by this - I actually had still not decided which one I wanted to do and this just made the decision for me. It did mean, however, that I was one year closer to entering the real world and finding a job and all that stuff. There is where lies a problem. I have no idea what I actually want to do. I am not career driven in any way. I am more driven by family. I am also incredibly doubtful of my confidence to do things, especially social things. I am very shy and as a general rule don't really know what to say to people.
At the beginning of the summer, I tried writing weekly targets and publishing them on here so that I wouldn't just waste the summer doing nothing and actually trying to make myself better. I didn't keep up with it very well, so I don't think that is a technique I am going to keep up, but I did manage to achieve some things that I am proud of.
Fordhall Farm
After finding out that I couldn't go to Portugal, I had to rethink my work experience plans. I sent an email to two local community led organisations asking if I could do some volunteering. I heard back from one of them and after going in for a chat we decided that there wasn't really much I could do that would benefit me in the way I wanted, so I waited for the other to get back to me. Eventually they did, and I went in for a chat and came out with an agreement I would go in on Mondays and Thursdays to work in the office of the Fordhall Community Land Initiative. For the first couple of weeks, the main office administrator gave me lots of jobs to do like stuffing envelopes, checking databases and checking receipts against accounts. Once I was shown how to do a job, I worked hard to do it quickly and correctly, and didn't complain at boring jobs (like stuffing envelopes). I actually didn't really mind them that much.
After the first couple of weeks, the main office administrator actually left for a new job, and one of the long term volunteers also left to do other work. This would have been ok, except there was a big annual event planned for the next weekend - FordFest beer festival. Also, the woman in charge of running the event hurt her knee, so couldn't really move on account of being on crutches. I volunteered to come in extra to help out. I ended up coming in every day the week leading up to the festival, which is very hard when you aren't used to it.
During that week, I took on more responsibilities. I opened and processed the post every day, which included setting up new direct debits. I had to answer the phone and even phone up some people, which is totally outside of my comfort zone. I actually get heart palpitations at the thought of having to phone someone. I helped out a lot with general FordFest preparations, like making up band packs for all of the bands playing. It was hard work, but I enjoyed it.
My Mum is a firm believer that taking opportunities creates new opportunities. I have to say that I agree completely, because if I hadn't asked to volunteer at Fordhall Farm, if I hadn't asked about the acoustic set, I wouldn't have gotten the opportunity for Liberty and I to sing at the festival, and we wouldn't have had the opportunity to play on the main stage rather than the little unamplified stage we were expecting when one of the acts didn't turn up on time. It was terrifying and amazing at the same time.
At the end of my work experience, I was given a Certificate of Generosity as thanks for the 65 hours of work I put in (I checked Mum, 65 is right!) It's only a piece of paper, but I really appreciated it. I have also been promised that I will be contacted about FordFest next year, so I look forwards to that!
Music
As well as playing at FordFest, I have been involved in various musical things this holiday. I sang a part in my younger sister's arrangement of A Thousand Years by Christina Perri to help her see how it would sound all together before she presented it for her house competition at school. I finally wrote the music to a song that I have been writing for 2 years, and have remembered why I love writing songs. I have inspired a little girl.
When I went to work at the boyfriend's mum's nursery, I brought my guitar along and played Stand By Me. A few weeks ago, when the new school term started, the boyfriend's mum said that one of the little girls that had taken to me came up to her with a ukulele and told her that she was getting her dad to learn some songs on the guitar so she could sing with him, and that she now knew all of the words to Stand By Me. That just made me melt inside a little bit. Music is a very important aspect to my life and I'm really happy that I inspired someone else with it.
Exercise
As you know, I have recently (well, for the past year) gotten into running. Unfortunately, I have a lot of problems with my knees, so I haven't been able to do much running. Instead of just giving up, I have been working at other things to try and strengthen myself up for running again - something that a couple of years ago I would never imagine myself doing.
I started going to a circuit training class, and surprised myself by enjoying it. I have honestly never sweated so much as when I go circuit training, and I often hurt for days afterwards, but I enjoyed it non the less.
I joined an archery group. I have always been interested in archery, but never managed to stick with it. I apparently have some natural talent for archery, and joining the club in my home town has made me more determined to join up again at Uni and actually stick with it. Maybe even join in a competition!
I downloaded a 30 day challenge app. Ok, so I have yet to actually complete any of the challenges, but each time I restart, I am still doing something. I realised that my needs changed, so picked a different exercise to do. Currently, I am doing push ups (girly style I'm afraid, I can't even do one properly) for my upper body to help with archery, plank for my core to help with general strength and running, and squats for my legs to hopefully help with my knee problem.
Now that I'm back at Uni, I am going to try and complete the beginner's training program that my family did with their running club. I'm trying to build up my speed and my stamina, as well as strengthen my knee of course. I went for my first run yesterday, and managed to go 1.6 miles, with my knee only starting to hurt in the last run/walk section.
In an effort to not waffle on for too long, I am going to leave it here. I may write a second part if I think of more things that I think are important, but for now I will just say that I think I have managed to grow and mature this summer. Usually when I leave for University I am really depressed during the week leading up to it and I cry when I leave my boyfriend and my Mum. I did have a cry on the Saturday before I left when my parkrun plans fell through, which was probably exacerbated by the fact I was leaving in a couple of days, but when I left my family I only felt sad for a little while. Of course I miss them, but I know I am seeing them again on Friday (which probably helps) and I have lots of exciting plans for the year ahead.
This summer, I found out that I was no longer staying on the four year course of my degree, but instead was being moved down to the three year course. I wasn't really too upset by this - I actually had still not decided which one I wanted to do and this just made the decision for me. It did mean, however, that I was one year closer to entering the real world and finding a job and all that stuff. There is where lies a problem. I have no idea what I actually want to do. I am not career driven in any way. I am more driven by family. I am also incredibly doubtful of my confidence to do things, especially social things. I am very shy and as a general rule don't really know what to say to people.
At the beginning of the summer, I tried writing weekly targets and publishing them on here so that I wouldn't just waste the summer doing nothing and actually trying to make myself better. I didn't keep up with it very well, so I don't think that is a technique I am going to keep up, but I did manage to achieve some things that I am proud of.
Fordhall Farm
After finding out that I couldn't go to Portugal, I had to rethink my work experience plans. I sent an email to two local community led organisations asking if I could do some volunteering. I heard back from one of them and after going in for a chat we decided that there wasn't really much I could do that would benefit me in the way I wanted, so I waited for the other to get back to me. Eventually they did, and I went in for a chat and came out with an agreement I would go in on Mondays and Thursdays to work in the office of the Fordhall Community Land Initiative. For the first couple of weeks, the main office administrator gave me lots of jobs to do like stuffing envelopes, checking databases and checking receipts against accounts. Once I was shown how to do a job, I worked hard to do it quickly and correctly, and didn't complain at boring jobs (like stuffing envelopes). I actually didn't really mind them that much.
After the first couple of weeks, the main office administrator actually left for a new job, and one of the long term volunteers also left to do other work. This would have been ok, except there was a big annual event planned for the next weekend - FordFest beer festival. Also, the woman in charge of running the event hurt her knee, so couldn't really move on account of being on crutches. I volunteered to come in extra to help out. I ended up coming in every day the week leading up to the festival, which is very hard when you aren't used to it.
During that week, I took on more responsibilities. I opened and processed the post every day, which included setting up new direct debits. I had to answer the phone and even phone up some people, which is totally outside of my comfort zone. I actually get heart palpitations at the thought of having to phone someone. I helped out a lot with general FordFest preparations, like making up band packs for all of the bands playing. It was hard work, but I enjoyed it.
My Mum is a firm believer that taking opportunities creates new opportunities. I have to say that I agree completely, because if I hadn't asked to volunteer at Fordhall Farm, if I hadn't asked about the acoustic set, I wouldn't have gotten the opportunity for Liberty and I to sing at the festival, and we wouldn't have had the opportunity to play on the main stage rather than the little unamplified stage we were expecting when one of the acts didn't turn up on time. It was terrifying and amazing at the same time.
At the end of my work experience, I was given a Certificate of Generosity as thanks for the 65 hours of work I put in (I checked Mum, 65 is right!) It's only a piece of paper, but I really appreciated it. I have also been promised that I will be contacted about FordFest next year, so I look forwards to that!
Music
As well as playing at FordFest, I have been involved in various musical things this holiday. I sang a part in my younger sister's arrangement of A Thousand Years by Christina Perri to help her see how it would sound all together before she presented it for her house competition at school. I finally wrote the music to a song that I have been writing for 2 years, and have remembered why I love writing songs. I have inspired a little girl.
When I went to work at the boyfriend's mum's nursery, I brought my guitar along and played Stand By Me. A few weeks ago, when the new school term started, the boyfriend's mum said that one of the little girls that had taken to me came up to her with a ukulele and told her that she was getting her dad to learn some songs on the guitar so she could sing with him, and that she now knew all of the words to Stand By Me. That just made me melt inside a little bit. Music is a very important aspect to my life and I'm really happy that I inspired someone else with it.
Exercise
As you know, I have recently (well, for the past year) gotten into running. Unfortunately, I have a lot of problems with my knees, so I haven't been able to do much running. Instead of just giving up, I have been working at other things to try and strengthen myself up for running again - something that a couple of years ago I would never imagine myself doing.
I started going to a circuit training class, and surprised myself by enjoying it. I have honestly never sweated so much as when I go circuit training, and I often hurt for days afterwards, but I enjoyed it non the less.
I joined an archery group. I have always been interested in archery, but never managed to stick with it. I apparently have some natural talent for archery, and joining the club in my home town has made me more determined to join up again at Uni and actually stick with it. Maybe even join in a competition!
I downloaded a 30 day challenge app. Ok, so I have yet to actually complete any of the challenges, but each time I restart, I am still doing something. I realised that my needs changed, so picked a different exercise to do. Currently, I am doing push ups (girly style I'm afraid, I can't even do one properly) for my upper body to help with archery, plank for my core to help with general strength and running, and squats for my legs to hopefully help with my knee problem.
Now that I'm back at Uni, I am going to try and complete the beginner's training program that my family did with their running club. I'm trying to build up my speed and my stamina, as well as strengthen my knee of course. I went for my first run yesterday, and managed to go 1.6 miles, with my knee only starting to hurt in the last run/walk section.
In an effort to not waffle on for too long, I am going to leave it here. I may write a second part if I think of more things that I think are important, but for now I will just say that I think I have managed to grow and mature this summer. Usually when I leave for University I am really depressed during the week leading up to it and I cry when I leave my boyfriend and my Mum. I did have a cry on the Saturday before I left when my parkrun plans fell through, which was probably exacerbated by the fact I was leaving in a couple of days, but when I left my family I only felt sad for a little while. Of course I miss them, but I know I am seeing them again on Friday (which probably helps) and I have lots of exciting plans for the year ahead.
Thursday, 14 August 2014
Story cube 3 - bumble bee, person dancing, a burst
On his way to collect nectar from the flowers, Bumble always
liked to stop in the garden and watch the humans. They were strange creatures,
with only two legs and two feelers, standing upright whenever they walked. The
rest of the hive warned Bumble about the humans, but his curiosity always
drowned out their voices in his mind. How bad could they be really? They
couldn’t even fly.
There was the Man, the Woman and the Smaller One. Bumble
didn’t know if it was male or female. There was nothing to set it apart either
way. It spent all of its time making loud noises or sleeping.
Today, they were all outside. The Man was spraying water
from a strange long, green thing all over the garden. The Woman was holding
something in her feelers, staring at it non-stop, only pausing to flick
something over then resume staring at it. Bumble had no idea what that was. The
Smaller One was sitting in the grass, pulling it up and dropping it on its
head. It made a loud gurgling sound each time that made Bumble feel happy. He
didn’t know what the sound was, nor why it made him so happy, but he wanted to
hear more.
He decided to get closer. Bumble usually kept his distance
from the humans. He was unsure how they would react to him and obviously the
warnings from the hive had had some effect on him. Today was just too much
though. He had to know more.
As he got closer, he saw the Smaller One look up at him. It
reached its pudgy feelers towards him. Its face didn’t seem evil. In fact, it
looked like it was friendly, so Bumble landed on top of its feeler. There was
no fur on the Smaller One’s feeler. It was just covered in a warm, fleshy
substance that was kind of sticky. The Smaller One was bringing its feeler closer
to its open mouth.
Suddenly, Bumble heard a high pitch noise come from the
direction of the Woman. Then there was a waft of air that rushed past him,
causing him to take to the air in shock. What was going on? The Woman was now
holding the Smaller One, who was making that loud noise again. Its face was all
screwed up and going red. Where was the Man?
Just as Bumble turned round to look for the Man, he felt
another waft of air. This time he was pushed sideways. The Man was waving his
feelers around. He looked ridiculous. Bumble had heard that humans sometimes
moved like this when there were harmonious sounds playing, but he couldn’t hear
any now. Bumble moved in and out of the Man’s flailing feelers, but eventually
one hit him.
Bumble felt a smack and his vision flashed white before him.
He felt himself soar through the air, but was powerless to stop it. He landed
in a flowerbed with a bump. He lay there for a while, gathering up his
strength, lying still in case the Man came looking for him. He didn’t want to
be found.
He had no idea how long he lay there, but after a while he
could no longer hear the humans. They must have left the garden, so Bumble got
up slowly and flew to the top of one of the flowers. After a quick glance
around to make sure he was really safe, Bumble shot off back in the direction
of the hive.
He would never stop to watch the humans again.
Sunday, 10 August 2014
Weekly Update
So far this week, I have done:
1 - Write story cube story 5 (bonus: try and write the one I missed too)
2 - Write types of numbers post
3 - Find more ideas for future types of numbers posts
4 - Go to work experience on Monday with enthusiasm
5 - Come out of work experience on Monday feeling like I have achieved something
6 - Go for a run - hopefully without too much knee pain
7 - Go on an adventure to find an archery store
8 - Read a chapter of a book - any book, I don't read enough
9 - Go through tax returns with the boyfriend's mum
10 - Do my archery exercises everyday
Well, the story cube is just a draft, but I've written it a lot earlier than I usually do, which is a big improvement on my failure to do it last week. I managed to read a chapter of my Bedside Algebra book and we found the archery store that had been recommended to us. Mum bought me an arm guard and a finger tab as the birthday present she owed me. We didn't get any more than that because the man in the store happens to be coming to the club that we shoot at, so he said he would be able to help me out more after he has seen me shoot. Who knows, maybe this time in a couple of weeks I will have my own bow! I'm not going to lie, that would be awesome.
I have done my archery exercises every day so far, except today, but that's because I did actual archery so I think I can forgive myself for that one. I could definitely tell that the exercises I have been doing are making a difference to my strength. I even almost have a muscle on my right arm!
Tomorrow I start my work experience. I'm quite nervous about it because my brain likes to go into overdrive and over think everything. If I don't know exactly what is supposed to happen, I start to panic. I don't know if I am driving, or if I can get a lift (which I would prefer - one less thing for me to worry about doing). I don't know where to park if I am driving. I asked, but I'm not sure I know which car park they meant. I don't know what it is going to be like working there. I think it is going to be interesting, but until I've actually done it, I am in try-not-to-panic mode. I'm going to write a post about it once I've done a week or so of work, so hopefully then I'll be able to say there was really nothing to panic about!
2 - Write types of numbers post
3 - Find more ideas for future types of numbers posts
4 - Go to work experience on Monday with enthusiasm
5 - Come out of work experience on Monday feeling like I have achieved something
6 - Go for a run - hopefully without too much knee pain
9 - Go through tax returns with the boyfriend's mum
10 - Do my archery exercises everyday
Well, the story cube is just a draft, but I've written it a lot earlier than I usually do, which is a big improvement on my failure to do it last week. I managed to read a chapter of my Bedside Algebra book and we found the archery store that had been recommended to us. Mum bought me an arm guard and a finger tab as the birthday present she owed me. We didn't get any more than that because the man in the store happens to be coming to the club that we shoot at, so he said he would be able to help me out more after he has seen me shoot. Who knows, maybe this time in a couple of weeks I will have my own bow! I'm not going to lie, that would be awesome.
I have done my archery exercises every day so far, except today, but that's because I did actual archery so I think I can forgive myself for that one. I could definitely tell that the exercises I have been doing are making a difference to my strength. I even almost have a muscle on my right arm!
Tomorrow I start my work experience. I'm quite nervous about it because my brain likes to go into overdrive and over think everything. If I don't know exactly what is supposed to happen, I start to panic. I don't know if I am driving, or if I can get a lift (which I would prefer - one less thing for me to worry about doing). I don't know where to park if I am driving. I asked, but I'm not sure I know which car park they meant. I don't know what it is going to be like working there. I think it is going to be interesting, but until I've actually done it, I am in try-not-to-panic mode. I'm going to write a post about it once I've done a week or so of work, so hopefully then I'll be able to say there was really nothing to panic about!
Thursday, 7 August 2014
Story Cube 2 - person playing with dolls, walking stick, person jumping off a ledge
Christie sat on the floor of her grandparent’s living room, playing with some dolls that had been left out for her. She didn’t really like dolls, but they were the only toys left over from when her mother was young, so they were brought out every time she came to visit.
What Christie really liked was stories.
She got that from her grandfather, who was currently sat in his usual spot in the big armchair, in front of the fire, reading a newspaper. Propped up against the wall beside him stood his gnarly old cane. Christie stared at it a while, then turned to her grandfather.
“Grandpa, why do you walk with a cane?” she asked him. He lowered his newspaper slightly, and looked over his glasses at her, with a hint of a smile on his face and a gleam in his eye. Christie knew the look well; it was story time.
“Well, you see sweetheart, I wasn’t always the doddery old man you know me to be. I was once an adventurer. I travelled all over the world looking for new and exciting journeys to take that would lead me where I least expected them to.”
Christie listened intently. Grandpa always told the best stories, and she could tell that today was going to be no exception.
“I was a young man, sailing across the sea as part of the crew on a small ship transporting a grand jewel back to England – the Wimueko. This jewel was priceless, so of course we had to guard it with our lives.
“All was going well until one fateful day. We had been suffering from a lack of wind, so had been rowing all morning. Rowing a ship, even a small one, is very hard work, so as you can imagine we had to stop for a rest. It was at this moment, when our guard was down, that we were suddenly ambushed by pirates! We rushed to arm ourselves, but the pirates were too quick. They had us surrounded. We were only a small crew, so they tied us to the mast of the ship. Then the captain arrived.
“Captain Ferdinand was the most feared pirate in them days. I recognised him at once by the scar across his nose, and the fact that he had different coloured eyes. One was a watery blue, but the other was a deep, dark black. There was evil in that eye.”
Christie shuffled closer to her grandfather’s feet. “What did you do Grandpa?”
“I did what any brave adventurer would do with something under his protection.” He leaned over his knees, close to Christie’s face, and whispered dramatically, “I challenged him to a duel!”
Leaning back in his chair so that he could gesture wildly with his arms, he continued with his story.
“There was just the two of us, circling each other, cutlasses in hand. All the other pirates gathered round to cheer on their captain, waiting for bloodshed. My blood. The fight began and we slashed at each other, high and low, jabbing and slicing, parrying and blocking. Just as one of us got the upper hand, the other would push back and level the playing field. It was a tremendous battle.
“Eventually, I got Captain Ferdinand cornered and pinned to the floor. The battle was won, and I was the champion. I stood over him and told him to leave and never come back! The pirates began leaving our ship, the captain following last. We thought we were safe, but at the last moment, the dirty rotten pirate turned and sliced at my leg, then left laughing on his ship.
The cut went deep, and became infected on the way home, but luckily the wind was on our side and we made a swift journey back. My leg was treated, but I have walked with a limp ever since.”
At this point, Christie’s grandmother poked her head through the door, announcing that dinner was ready. Christie jumped up and grabbed the cane for her grandfather then watched as he lumbered his way into the kitchen. As much as she loved hearing her grandfather’s stories, Christie also had a thirst to know the truth. Walking over to her grandmother, she whispered to her so that her grandfather didn’t hear, “what really happened to his leg Grandma?”
Christie’s grandmother looked over at her husband, then back to her granddaughter.
“Well,” she whispered back. “When he was a boy, he thought he could fly, so he tried to jump off the roof.”
What Christie really liked was stories.
She got that from her grandfather, who was currently sat in his usual spot in the big armchair, in front of the fire, reading a newspaper. Propped up against the wall beside him stood his gnarly old cane. Christie stared at it a while, then turned to her grandfather.
“Grandpa, why do you walk with a cane?” she asked him. He lowered his newspaper slightly, and looked over his glasses at her, with a hint of a smile on his face and a gleam in his eye. Christie knew the look well; it was story time.
“Well, you see sweetheart, I wasn’t always the doddery old man you know me to be. I was once an adventurer. I travelled all over the world looking for new and exciting journeys to take that would lead me where I least expected them to.”
Christie listened intently. Grandpa always told the best stories, and she could tell that today was going to be no exception.
“I was a young man, sailing across the sea as part of the crew on a small ship transporting a grand jewel back to England – the Wimueko. This jewel was priceless, so of course we had to guard it with our lives.
“All was going well until one fateful day. We had been suffering from a lack of wind, so had been rowing all morning. Rowing a ship, even a small one, is very hard work, so as you can imagine we had to stop for a rest. It was at this moment, when our guard was down, that we were suddenly ambushed by pirates! We rushed to arm ourselves, but the pirates were too quick. They had us surrounded. We were only a small crew, so they tied us to the mast of the ship. Then the captain arrived.
“Captain Ferdinand was the most feared pirate in them days. I recognised him at once by the scar across his nose, and the fact that he had different coloured eyes. One was a watery blue, but the other was a deep, dark black. There was evil in that eye.”
Christie shuffled closer to her grandfather’s feet. “What did you do Grandpa?”
“I did what any brave adventurer would do with something under his protection.” He leaned over his knees, close to Christie’s face, and whispered dramatically, “I challenged him to a duel!”
Leaning back in his chair so that he could gesture wildly with his arms, he continued with his story.
“There was just the two of us, circling each other, cutlasses in hand. All the other pirates gathered round to cheer on their captain, waiting for bloodshed. My blood. The fight began and we slashed at each other, high and low, jabbing and slicing, parrying and blocking. Just as one of us got the upper hand, the other would push back and level the playing field. It was a tremendous battle.
“Eventually, I got Captain Ferdinand cornered and pinned to the floor. The battle was won, and I was the champion. I stood over him and told him to leave and never come back! The pirates began leaving our ship, the captain following last. We thought we were safe, but at the last moment, the dirty rotten pirate turned and sliced at my leg, then left laughing on his ship.
The cut went deep, and became infected on the way home, but luckily the wind was on our side and we made a swift journey back. My leg was treated, but I have walked with a limp ever since.”
At this point, Christie’s grandmother poked her head through the door, announcing that dinner was ready. Christie jumped up and grabbed the cane for her grandfather then watched as he lumbered his way into the kitchen. As much as she loved hearing her grandfather’s stories, Christie also had a thirst to know the truth. Walking over to her grandmother, she whispered to her so that her grandfather didn’t hear, “what really happened to his leg Grandma?”
Christie’s grandmother looked over at her husband, then back to her granddaughter.
“Well,” she whispered back. “When he was a boy, he thought he could fly, so he tried to jump off the roof.”
Wednesday, 6 August 2014
Weekly Targets 6th August - 12th August
After the horror of realising that Sharknado 2 was airing the same time as in America, not when I thought it was, and watching the Shining instead, I accidentally forgot to set myself targets last week. I did however start a new thing with Liberty. She sent me a link to a post in relation to helping my time slippage, which was about this schedule that the person who wrote it sticks to to stay productive. We thought we would try it out.
I let Liberty fill it in today... Basically it is just a laminated schedule that I can write on each day with whiteboard pens. It is quite hard to stick to it exactly at the moment because each day I'm doing something different, but I think it will be really useful when I go back to Uni.
Anyway, this week I managed to go driving a couple of times (scary, I know!) even once on my own today (even more scary!!). I had an awesome time shooting balloon dogs at archery, with the instructors saying that I had advanced technique and joking that I could be the next Danielle Brown. I went to Ford Hall Farm and have sorted out getting some work experience there starting next Monday. I finished the second chapter of the accountancy book. Now onto this week:
1 - Write story cube story 5 (bonus: try and write the one I missed too)
2 - Write types of numbers post
3 - Find more ideas for future types of numbers posts
4 - Go to work experience on Monday with enthusiasm
5 - Come out of work experience on Monday feeling like I have achieved something
6 - Go for a run - hopefully without too much knee pain
7 - Go on an adventure to find an archery store
8 - Read a chapter of a book - any book, I don't read enough
9 - Go through tax returns with the boyfriend's mum
10 - Do my archery exercises everyday
Can you tell I'm getting slightly obsessed with archery?
I let Liberty fill it in today... Basically it is just a laminated schedule that I can write on each day with whiteboard pens. It is quite hard to stick to it exactly at the moment because each day I'm doing something different, but I think it will be really useful when I go back to Uni.
Anyway, this week I managed to go driving a couple of times (scary, I know!) even once on my own today (even more scary!!). I had an awesome time shooting balloon dogs at archery, with the instructors saying that I had advanced technique and joking that I could be the next Danielle Brown. I went to Ford Hall Farm and have sorted out getting some work experience there starting next Monday. I finished the second chapter of the accountancy book. Now onto this week:
1 - Write story cube story 5 (bonus: try and write the one I missed too)
2 - Write types of numbers post
3 - Find more ideas for future types of numbers posts
4 - Go to work experience on Monday with enthusiasm
5 - Come out of work experience on Monday feeling like I have achieved something
6 - Go for a run - hopefully without too much knee pain
7 - Go on an adventure to find an archery store
8 - Read a chapter of a book - any book, I don't read enough
9 - Go through tax returns with the boyfriend's mum
10 - Do my archery exercises everyday
Can you tell I'm getting slightly obsessed with archery?
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