So I made it to the end of the month, sort of. I didn't post every day, but I managed to post something for every day. Some days it was really hard to think of something happy, but I did it. And now for my last happy thing for the month:
I managed to get a but motivated for revision again today. I didn't do a huge amount, but I did much more than I have been doing previously, and it wasn't too hard to get myself to do it. I feel like I might be able to do a bit more tomorrow.
We've been sorting our stuff out at home recently, and I now have a big box to put things in to keep for wherever I end up living after I graduate. It's starting to feel very real now.
I learned how to play cribbage. I've had a cribbage set for ages, and in the spirit of clearing out stuff, I decide to learn how to play it to decide whether or not to keep it. The boyfriend and I played a quick round, probably not completely right, but I enjoyed it. And I won! I think I might keep it. Maybe I'll put it in my new box.
Well that's it for this month's challenge. Now I have to start thinking of what to do next month.
I am sticking with the excuse of not using my computer every day anymore. That counts right?
#24 - helped the boyfriend's hallmates make cakes for an SU presidential campaign. I think I've been put off cake for a while now, but the process was fun.
#25 - had a better time at the boyfriend's singing society than the last time I went. When I went before, he just sort of ran off and left me for the two hours, didn't introduce me to anyone and didn't include me in anything. I was already feeling down and really nervous about going, and I am really terrible at social situations. I actually get heart palpitations, it's really not good. So I may as well have not gone to that session. This time, I was introduced to everyone, and I joined in with the warm ups and very awkwardly filled in some spaces in the dance moves where people were missing. That is quite a big achievement for me because I hate dancing, and it was in front of people I don't know.
#26 - I finally had my physio consultation today. I didn't get lost on the way, and the woman has said that she thinks I have a form of jogger's knee, but the biggest problem is that my hips aren't strong enough to support my knees and they just kind of wobble a lot. I have my next appointment booked, so hopefully I can start to get that sorted soon!
#27 - had a nice time with my mum today going to the Easter service at church with the kid's primary school and then watching the kids in their second swimming lesson. I also threw away a load of stuff from my childhood in preparation for moving onto the next part of my life. Started to come up with an idea of where I can live next year, which is very exciting!
#28 - went to see McBusted with the boyfriend and his sister. The show was absolutely brilliant (they had a flying Delorean and referenced Bill and Ted, a sure fire way to win me over) and I really enjoyed the company.
#29 - impromptu drinks party! Ok I was basically asleep through most of it, but I still had a nice time.
#30 - impromptu gym session! Liberty asked me this morning if I wanted to go to the gym and swimming with her today to see if some exercise would help with the depression I've been feeling recently. As I can't really go running at the moment I thought it would be worth a try. I was more interested in the swimming as that is something I was thinking of trying to do over the summer, but the gym was fun too. I didn't really push myself that hard at the gym, I didn't want to strain my legs too much nor wear myself out too much for swimming. I surprised myself a bit with the swimming. I didn't think I was going to be very good, but I did at least 6 lengths of breast stroke, getting a little bit better each time. My knee doesn't hurt either, so I think it could be good for me.
#20 - Spent the day with Liberty again. We played loads of Lego Pirates, started making a dress (don't ask...), and getting ideas for my revision. In the evening, the boyfriend came round from his Uni, and we got Papa John's pizza and played Pandemic. It was fun.
#21 - Today we went to Comic Con in Birmingham. The boyfriend and I have been to this one before, but Liberty had only been to a small on in Stoke-on-Trent. We didn't dress up, although Liberty and I were wearing our newly bought geek outfits including a Terminator t-shirt and Batman shorts (not in the same outfit) and we weren't really interested in getting anything signed or having photos taken with celebrities (I think we only really recognised three people anyway), but we love looking round all the stalls, seeing all the things you can buy and, my favourite, people watching. There are so many people wearing so many different costumes. There were a lot of people dressed as Elsa and Anna from Frozen, but there were also a lot of original costumes. My particular favourite was the group of people dressed as the parents from Rugrats. They were ace. I also bought myself an awesome pocket watch because I've been wanting a watch for ages, and pocket watches are cool.
It was a really good day, despite the massive headache I had.
#22 - had a lovely meal with the family and an awesome time playing our old version of Taboo. Mum is trying to clear out the cupboards, and one of the things to do is play through all our old board games and see which ones are worth keeping. Taboo was a load of fun, but a bit outdated (what e heck is a luncheon voucher?!) so that one got thrown out. Not before we all cried from laughter a few times.
#23 - got some of my revision done today. Think I can start to see how I might be able to be productive with this way of working. It satisfies my love of colour coding things and organising things neatly. And I worked out what I'm going to use all of my notepads and post-it notes that Liberty made me buy.
After dinner I played a couple of games of Whist with the boyfriend and one of his hallmates. That was fun.
My trip to Currys to get my laptop fixed didn't go how we planned it. If I'm to get a refund, I need to send it off to Toshiba first, and that will take 28 working days. The guy in the shop kept trying to blame me for downloading Steam, when it was the Toshiba software update that crashed my computer, and then refreshed my computer, again. Liberty has told me not to install anything on it, just what I need for revision, and then after my exams are finished install stuff and see if it breaks again then send it off. I'm already having trouble just installing avg on it. Then I got a phone call saying that my physio appointment has been moved two days later, so I have to stay here by myself for an extra two days and may not have the chance to visit the boyfriend. So today has been a bit of a disappointment.
The evening was much better though. Liberty and her other half took me out to Wing Wah - an all you can eat pan-Asian restaurant. We had Chinese for starters, went onto the Chinese main course, then the Indian main course, then had the most amazing pancakes for pudding. I was absolutely stuffed. Then Liberty came back to my house and we slobber out playing Lego Pirates of the Caribbean because we couldn't move. It was fun :)
Ok, so I'm really being terrible at this one a day thing.
#15 - watched Big Hero 6 with the boyfriend. It was really cute.
#16 - managed to get my files all backed up and a plan put in place to go to currys to *try* and get a replacement laptop when Liberty comes to visit on Wednesday.
#17 - tidied my room and nearly finished copying up the lecture notes from one of my modules this term. I haven't yet started my proper revision for my exams after Easter, and I thought just finishing this one off would ease me into it a bit. Maybe...
#18 - girly fun times with Liberty! We got our hair cut (about time too, I've not had it done since September 2013...), we bought new clothes for comic con this weekend and I got a really cool pair of skinny jeans covered in green roses. Liberty also made me buy some notebooks and owl post-its to help with revision. Not sure how they will help, but one of them looks like a giant custard cream
I've been feeling a bit down today for various reasons, mostly involving my laptop. Since it is Pi day today, the boyfriend went out and came back with this to cheer me up.
After today I should get back into posting every day. Should...
#12 - Finished and handed in the second to last assignment. Also finished most of my lectures. Just one lecture and one assignment left to go. Also, my OCD was satisfied greatly at the end of Groups and Representations when my lecture notes finished perfectly at the end of page 100.
#13 - After a huge rush to get it (mostly) done, I have finished my last ever university assignment, and attended my last official lecture. All that is left are some revision lectures next term and my exams - how scary is that?!
On Sunday I completely forgot to write my Happy Days post until I was already in bed. I planned to do a double post on Monday, which would have been hard anyway as I was having a really bad day, but was then made impossible by the sudden dying of my laptop. So on Monday I not only found out that I couldn't go to the London Marathon to support my Mother-out-law who is taking part, but I also found out I may not make it in time to see the boyfriend in a concert that he is performing at next term, and my computer stopped working just in time for my very busy week of getting my last two assignments finished. I have been looking forwards to the Marathon ever since Liberty, Charlie and I threw a penny in a random fountain wishing that the boyfriend's mum would have a place in it when we were there last year. It was supposed to be something for me to look forwards to at the end of my first (yes first) lot of exams. But I have an exam on both the Saturday and Monday, so can't justify going. I have been trying all week to fix my laptop, and have today resorted to refreshing it, meaning it has kept all my files, but I have to reinstall EVERYTHING. Including all the updates. Sigh.
It's been really hard to think of happy things for each day, but here we go.
#8 - the boyfriend made a good fry up for dinner.
#9 - finished the bulk of one of my assignments, meaning I just need to write it up neat and then I only have two to concentrate on for the rest of the week.
#10 - had a nice chat with Liberty.
#11- halfway through the last week of term.
I really had to think hard for those... I can't wait for this week to be over.
I've had a pretty good day all round today really. Had a nice lazy morning with the boyfriend, shooting zombies and killing orcs. Then we went into town, I bought some bits and pieces from Wilko, including a thermos mug that I'm going to try out bringing tea in for my early lectures next week. Then we went to the cinema and watched the wonderfully ridiculous Kingsman: The Secret Service. It was just the right balance of really cool stunts and not taking itself too seriously. We spent the rest of the evening just relaxing, buying tickets for comic con in March (super excited about that!) and playing games.
I also finally built the first of my 14in1 robot kit, the turtlebot:
I think he looks pretty cool. Now if only the solar panel actually worked!
A couple of days ago, I mentioned that my new book, Staying Strong by Demi Lovato, had arrived. It is set out so that each day there is a quote, or a meditation or something, and a goal to try and achieve to help you realise that you are a strong person. I have a small dilemma in that I don't know whether to just read it from the beginning, doing one each day, read up to today's date then continue one each day, or just start on today's date and loop back round when it comes to the new year. I have, however, read the introduction and the entry for January 1st.
(I have no idea if you can actually read that or not...) The goal for the day is to come up with your own mantra, something that is yours, that you can look in the mirror and say to yourself each day. I had no idea where to start with that.
In the introduction it says that everyone needs a higher power that they can turn to for comfort. I'm not religious, so I don't want to say God is my higher power. I kind of believe in Karma and just the general power of the universe, but neither of those felt right to me. I talked to my boyfriend about it, and he suggested Logic as my higher power. Although I am a very logical person, I sometimes feel like my logic can make things seem worse, not comforted.
I decided to talk to Ivy about it. I'm not sure why I picked Ivy in particular, maybe because she has absolutely no logic so has a very different way of looking at things than myself and the rest of my sisters. She said that to make a mantra I had to think of something that would make me feel solid. She then added (emotionally not fatty), just to give you an indication of her logic. She asked me what reassures me when I'm down, what comforts me? At the time I was sat on the bus with my headphones in, and I realised that there is something that I can always count on to give me wisdom, or make me feel happy, or sad when I need it. Music. Music is my higher power. And just to prove the point, a song came on at that moment that gave me inspiration for my mantra. I had literally that morning decided to listen to something other than the 80 songs I have on repeat on my obsession playlist, and ended up choosing Lucy Spraggan. Here is the song that started playing at that moment I decided to look for a lyric to be my mantra:
This whole song is basically saying that it doesn't matter what you do, you are already someone and you can be happy with what you have in life. What particularly caught my attention was the last verse before the final choruses.
You may never have another chance
The stars are in your reach
You have the power in your hands
It's time now to believe
You will always have the secret
You will always have the air to breath
Everyday say to yourself this future is for me
I believe that everything happens for a reason. Mum watched X-Factor, and our friend took us to the V-Festival, where Lucy Spraggan (who was on X-Factor that year) was playing. Mum wanted to see her so we went along. I enjoyed her music, and knew mum did, so I bought her the album for Christmas. I decided this morning to listen to something I hadn't heard for a while, and picked that album. Just when I decided music was my higher power, it gave me this song. It all happens for a reason.
So my happy thing for today is that I found something to take comfort in, and I completed the first goal in my new book. My mantra to repeat to myself is:
You have the power in your hands, it's time now to believe. This future is for me.
On another, but no less important note, my boyfriend is currently on his way to spend the weekend with me, so that makes me happy too!
No picture today I'm afraid. My happy thing for the day is that I finished and handed in my Introduction to Number Theory assignment today - a day early. I don't think that's ever happened...
I have two things to share today. One is serious, and one is silly. First of all, my new book came today.
It's a book with 365 quotes and insights that I thought might help me with battling my depression. Each day has a message and a goal to try and achieve. Who knows, it could work. Plus, I quite love Demi Lovato.
Now for the silly thing.
Legitimately got to write Ass all over my commutative algebra notes today. Had a right good giggle with my friend about that in the middle of lecture. We are so mature.
Well... February was an utter fail. Last weekend I had a complete meltdown and had to go home. I talked a lot with a lot of different people, and hopefully have some plans to get me back on track with battling this depression. I have some disgusting Rescue Remedy Spray, and a new to-do list complete with rewards for when I feel like I've achieved something. Keeping with this theme, Liberty challenged me this month to post every day on here with something that has made me happy that day. So here goes:
1st March:
I scored 485 out of 600 points in archery today - a new PB (by 5 points, but shhh)
